Catalyst

She's a catalyst. By definition, she is the person that makes a reaction occur, but in the process of that reaction, she is unchanged. She doesn't get to be a part of the sizzle, smoke, boom! bam! of the experiment, she just gets to do the work. She makes things happen. Always has, always will. But she wants to be a part, she wants to be the smoke, or the sizzle, not the catalyst...but that is what she is. After the reaction, she is removed from one experiment and used in the next one. It's her duty, and she cannot slack off on her responsibilities. No one cares about the catalyst, they are mesmerized my the sights and sounds that she has produced, but no one takes time to notice her. She tires of her job sometimes, actually, a lot of times, but she accepts her place. She is a go-getter, she makes moves and moves people. And it's not all bad. Sometimes the reactions bring her joy. But when they don't, she wishes someone would see her, feel her feelings, know what it's like. But alas, she is enveloped in smoke and the sound of the sizzle drowns out the voice that she makes hoarse trying to be heard. She is who she is, it won't change. She is a catalyst, and she's not allowed to react.

Sexually Silent

"Let's talk about sex baby. Let's talk about you and me. Let's talk about all the good things and the bad things that could be. Let's talk about sex, Let's talk about sex."

Men are encouraged to be sexual. It's a part of the passage into manhood. Women however, better be able to wear white at their wedding, or they get whispered about as they walk down the aisle. But here's the question: If all these young men are having sex, who are they doing it with? Girls, silly. Girls who can't express themselves sexually because they will be labeled as promiscuous. Girls who are afraid to tell their friends what's going on, but if they actually talked to each other they might find out they're all going through the same thing. Guys are so surprised when they find a girl who is willing to talk about sex, but it's a conversation that needs to be had. You don't get anywhere with secrets and silence. And besides, whatever you thought was secret definitely got talked about, just not with you.

I think men and women should be able to have open, honest conversations about sex. It might alleviate a lot of pressure, help build reasonable expectations, and it would help dissolve some of the male-female double standard stereotypes that exist. And honestly, we should all be exploring this with our partners. Be inventive, creative, passionate, sensual, in love, whatever, but most of all...BE INFORMED. A little knowledge can go a long way. Whether it's in the way of contraceptives, new things to try, family planning (don't look stunned, be prepared!) or talking just to be talking, it helps.

Women need to talk about what pleases them, because brotha is gonna get his and he'll be happy regardless. Men need to do the same, because a little spice might make the relationship last longer. Talk to your woman before you decide to move on to the next. Teach each other. You learn something new everyday, so it might as well be something useful!
Talk about sex!